Social media has inundated our lives. Don’t get me wrong, it IS a great tool to connect with others, but we don’t generally see people’s real life. We see what they want us to see — the edited, filtered versions of their lives. I mean, honestly, I don’t know too many people sharing the moments of being awakened in the early morning hours with vomit dripping from their hair, or soaked clothes from being peed on. Or the moments the house is literally turned upside down with piles of laundry, overflowing dishes, and toys scattered throughout. We don’t want people to see that we don’t have it together like all the “Pinterest Moms.”
As we scroll through Facebook, Instagram, or Pinterest, we become so defeated because we are not the “perfect” mom. Who is? We see cute little kids in their perfect outfits, stay-at-home moms doing crafts and decorating their homes like we see on HGTV.
We are quick to share our happy moments with everyone, but when we struggle, we lock ourselves in this internal prison of feeling like we are all alone. You are NOT alone in this journey. Motherhood is extremely overwhelming….I mean we’re raising humans. We are not perfect, we are not always put together, our homes are not always clean, and that’s life!
Knowing our own lives are not perfect, why do we assume everyone else’s is?
Let me get super real for a moment….
There are times that I absolutely feel incapable of doing this whole “single mama” thing, and I want to give up. There’s no partner at home to help wash dishes, give baths, help with homework, break up fights, drive kids to practices, help with dinner, and the other many daily tasks. On top of that, I am the daily provider, making sure everyone has what they need. This is a 24/7, 365, don’t get a sick day, roller coaster of a life. I absolutely love and adore my children, but there are moments that I don’t see the light at the end of the tunnel. Those moments I’m not sure I will ever get to tomorrow, or at least make it with my sanity intact. There are times I want to lock myself in my room and hide under the covers hoping to bury the overwhelming emotions of life. Meanwhile, praying that I’m not completely screwing up my children. Honestly, life can be so overwhelming, especially as a single mom. Now this, this is real life. These emotions are real.
We are quick to show all of the good, the cute pictures of our kids and their accomplishments. But rarely do we get real and honest about what our life really feels like at times, mostly because we fear being judged by others. I’m not talking about airing your dirty laundry, but instead getting real about the struggles of motherhood. Struggling while raising children does not make you a bad mom, but it makes you human.
How do we get past feeling like we’re not good moms? We have got to cut ourselves some slack, ladies! We tend to put too much on our plates and expect ourselves to complete it all on our own. These are a few things that have helped me feel like I’m not a total hot mess mama…
1. Set realistic goals.
2. Get your children involved with household chores and cooking.
3. Stop stressing out about things you can’t control.
4. Take some time and do something for yourself.
What if instead of judging other moms for their choice of parenting or how they live their life, we rally together and support each other? That’s the importance of finding your tribe. When you have those relationships, you find people to pick you up when you feel like you’re a complete mess and failing at this motherhood thing. They will be the ones to encourage you when you need it the most.
I wrote this to simply say that there are no perfect mothers, regardless of social media appearance, or the face we put on in public. We are all navigating this journey through motherhood to raise good humans.
Do not ever feel like you’re alone, or everyone else’s kids are so much more well behaved. You are doing your best, and you are enough!
“Don’t panic. I’m with you. There’s no need to fear for I’m your God. I’ll give you strength. I’ll help you. I’ll hold you steady, keep a firm grip on you.”
Isaiah 41:10 (MSG)
Fierce Mama 
Leave a comment